sansgod:

i just heard a water bottle in my room crack… there’s a ghost out here just trying to get hydrated… i can respect that

Shared Sep 16 with 56,024 notes » via - source + reblog




heartattackle:

hertzwhale:

pamela-jane:

I know its a little early but

Jingle Bell Rock w/ my mom

i hate being that person who comments on posts but i just want u all to know that i watch this video all the fucking time every year once it hits september bc nothing gets me more pumped for christmas than this person rocking out w/ their mom while their mom windexes a countertop

Janis Ians original choreography.

Shared Sep 16 with 176,974 notes » via - source + reblog
# I love this so much




              agirlcalledfrost
OH OH OH PLEASE TELL US A BOARDING SCHOOL STORY PRETTY PLEASE

karenhealey:

bookdrunkinlove:

ofgeography:

so my school had this thing called “senior skip day,” except that senior skip day didn’t exist and every year the administration sent out emails in the spring that were like DON’T FUCKIN SKIP CLASS OR YOU WILL RECEIVE RESTRICTION (restriction was like, my boarding school’s equivalent of detention where instead of staying after school you had to go to bed early and help stuff envelopes advertising the summer program until your hands were BLOODIED AND CRIPPLED BY CARPAL TUNNEL) and every year the seniors were like YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!

  • spoiler alert: yes they can? THEY ALWAYS CAN.
  • 200 years of american high school and teenagers still think that there is a cap limit on kids in detention and that you can leave after 15 minutes if the teacher doesn’t show up.

anyway, my senior year, we all got together and nattered at each other until some brave soldier (i feel like it was my friend paula but WHO KNOWS) was like “OK SENIOR SKIP DAY IS THIS THURSDAY!!!! NOBODY GO TO CLASS OR UR A SCAB.”

  • she didn’t say scab because she’s not from the 1920s and we aren’t newsies, though this story would be way more interesting if we were
  • what she said was “YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!”
  • except not yolo because it was 2009 and drake hadn’t been invented yet except as a dear sweet boy in a wheelchair.

we also used this email system to communicate with one another that has very deeply informed the way i understand email and which probably makes it very frustrating to be my friend and receive emails that have subject lines like “URGENT” and then just 42 links to the same florida georgia line youtube video.

  • I’M NOT ASHAMED, but in that way where like i kind of AM ashamed so i’m really aggressively NOT ashamed? 

so the day of reckoning rolls around and my alarm goes off at 8 (class started at 8:05 but i liked to PLAY WITH FIRE when it came to being late; my mom actually asked the school to stop emailing her when i was a sophomore because i was late so often that their rote “Mrs. Ofgeography we are emailing you to say—” was CLOGGING UP HER INBOX and she was like “i GET IT MY CHILD IS THE MOST BORING MISCREANT OF ALL TIME.”) and i looked at my roommate elle and she looked at me and went, “you going?”

"hell no," i said. "YOLO. they can’t punish all of us."

elle, who was far prettier and far cooler than i was with the notable exception of her obsession with tswift’s “love story” and her tendency to look at the endangered species list and cry sometimes during study hall, quickly bizounced across the street to this shopping center thing where all the cool kids smoked in secret where huge trucks dropped off clothes for the Dress Barn. i think there were also tennis courts nearby. more importantly there was this chinese food delivery place and a lil restaurant that made HELLA BAGELS.

  • WHAT KIND OF BAGELS?
  • FUCKIN
  • HELLA.

off goes elle! meanwhile i’m like, “yessssss i’m gonna use senior skip day to watch 14 hours of tv shows and eat frozen peanut butter bars that i stole from the dining hall! I’M GONNA LIVE LIKE I’M 23 ALONE IN CHICAGO ON A WEEKEND WHEN MY ONLY PLAN IS TAKEOUT AND CUDDLING WITH THE FAUX-SNOW-LEOPARD BLANKET I WILL ONE DAY SURELY OWN.” 

of course, during this time the administration was continuing to send out emails that reminded us with increasing urgency that senior skip day was NOT A THING and that we were ALL GETTING RESTRICTION if we didn’t get our STUPID ASSES TO CLASS, GODDAMNIT, WE ARE NOT RUNNING A CIRCUS HERE. 

but i was like! yolo, motherfuckers!!! i already got into college, YOU CAN’T TOUCH ME.

at some point during the day elle and our friend ginna came back to the room with takeout from the chinese delivery place and we sat on our floor eating it and probably watching veronica mars or looking at the endangered species list and crying.

all of a sudden, elle said, “guys shut up, guys shut up, GUYS SHUT UP,” and ginna and i were like, “WHAT we have a LOT to SAY about FRIED FUCKING DUMPLINGS, ELLE," and elle said, "did you hear that?"

"hear what?"

that!”

'that' was the sound of one of our dorm moms, mrs. f, knocking on doors and saying things like, “IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR BUTTS TO CLASS IN 5 MINUTES YOU'RE ON CATEGORY 4 RESTRICTION FOREVER.” elle quickly scampered up our raised beds to hide in the corner, where a tiny human like elle could actually hide from view; i leapt immediately into what we called a closet but was basically a cubby with a flap that was DEFINITELY not meant for a 5'8” individual with knobby as hell knees.

our door, which was never locked because we both hated the effort of typing in the lock code, opened. mrs. f said, “mollyhall?”

i held my breath. 

  • i should add here that i seemed to be operating on like a scooby-doo level of logic where basically i thought that she was somehow NOT ALLOWED to investigate?
  • like, if she can’t see me, there is NO POSSIBLE WAY that she could prove i’m in here, right?
  • she’ll just poke her head in and be like oH GOSH NO KIDS HERE and leave!!

you can see the flaw in my logic.

mrs. f sighed. “mollyhall, i know you’re in here, i literally heard your voice ten seconds ago.”

  • there’s no WAY she guesses i’m in the closet!!!

"mollyhall, i know you’re in the closet."

  • NO YOU DON’T
  • I AM SCHRÖDINGER’S SENIOR

"mollyhall—"

there was a creak. mrs. f stopped. it wasn’t actually a “creak,” so much as this like, prolonged groan? like it’s the sound an elephant would make if it sat on a really large accordion.

i poked my head out of the closet. mrs. f looked at me. elle sat up.

i said, “where’s ginna?”

  • YOU KNOW WHERE GINNA WAS.

"um," said elle, "she’s in the—"

  • GINNA NO

ginna yes.

i really wish i could describe the sound the ceiling made when it collapsed. it sounded a lot like the way losing your breath feels. i sort of remember ginna falling in like, really slow motion, like i could see the expression on her face. i didn’t really think about how i would describe this in words. ginna’s face said:

  • oh no.
  • what have i done?
  • this was a mistake. 
  • i regret a series of decisions that i have made.
  • is there a way out of this?
  • are those oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • why are there oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • mollyhall, you HAVE a food cupboard, what good is a food cupboard if you don’t—
  • oh, crap.

she belly flopped onto the floor. i mean, the girl bounced. and then she just laid there. mrs. f looked at her. elle looked at her. i looked at her, still mostly in the closet. we were all going to get category 4 restriction forever.

ginna said, “hi, mrs. f. i feel like i should explain.”

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER READ.

No but really the level of my non breathing silent laugh sobs is pretty intense right now.

I have at least seven students who would totally do this in exactly this manner.

Shared Sep 16 with 8,250 notes » via - source + reblog




jaimeuncledaddylannister:

here we are kids
it’s finally over

jaimeuncledaddylannister:

here we are kids

it’s finally over

Shared Sep 16 with 19,612 notes » via - source + reblog




fanofthedoctor3:

andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:

djko31:

andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:

GUYS I WAS SINGING IN THE SHOWER AND I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE IN THE BATHROOM ‘CAUSE IT’S A COMMUNAL BATHROOM AND WHEN I FINISHED AND SHUT OFF THE SHOWER PEOPLE FUCKING APPLAUDED 

I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND I NEARLY HAD A HEART ATTACK 

GUYS

I’m laughing more than I should…..

GUYS THIS WASN’T SUPPOSED TO GET ANY NOTES WHAT ARE YOU DOING 

GUYS

are you kidding this is hilarious

Shared Sep 16 with 32,996 notes » via - source + reblog




slutty-ukes:

why do I still read youtube comments like have I not learned anything

Shared Sep 16 with 3,725 notes » via - source + reblog




encourage:

"say something i’m giving up on you"

Shared Sep 16 with 514,203 notes » via - source + reblog




captain-fucking-levi:

averypottermormon:

captain-fucking-levi:

ya-boy-levi:

captain-fucking-levi:

why am i not the protagonist of an amazing story

you are though—its called your life

shut the fuck up i wanna struggle fighting demons not struggle with getting out of bed every day

but those are your demons

i am hereby naming you as the antagonist and now it is my sole job to find you and hit you in the face with a chair for that bitch ass comment you just made

Shared Sep 15 with 45,222 notes » via - source + reblog




prongsmydeer:

Harry Potter AU where someone sees Harry in his cousin’s over-sized clothing with his underfed body and hears him casually mention the cupboard in which he sleeps and calls the fucking police

Shared Sep 15 with 202,710 notes » via - source + reblog




I can’t with this sign because

saltandpuff:

image

BACK FOOT OPEN

RUB RUB 7 DAYS

Shared Sep 15 with 40,299 notes » via - source + reblog




official-sebastianstan:

Everyone Loves a Good Car Jam!!! - by Thomas Sanders

LITERALLY THE BEST PART IS YOU CAN SEE THE PURE SHOCK ON HIS FACE

Shared Sep 15 with 100,099 notes » via - source + reblog




chryswatchesgot:

Chrys Watches GoT [x]

Shared Sep 15 with 62,400 notes » via - source + reblog




princekenkaneki:

lastoneout:

green-globbin:

thebest-memes:

"No matter how bad you fuck up at work, you didn’t fucked up this bad"

Oh my god. How do you even fix that

did he live?

free him

princekenkaneki:

lastoneout:

green-globbin:

thebest-memes:

"No matter how bad you fuck up at work, you didn’t fucked up this bad"

Oh my god. How do you even fix that

did he live?

free him

Shared Sep 15 with 105,969 notes » via - source + reblog




panic/anxiety attack

alikattnip:

vye-leviathan:

pushed-too-far:

chris-sid:

jaspinder:

  • breath in for 4 seconds
  • hold your breath for 7 seconds
  • exhale breath for 8 seconds

repeat once or twice more.

This causes an autonomic nervous system shift from a sympathetic (fight or flight reaction) state to a parasympathetic response.

Use this for panic/anxiety attacks, exams, presentations.

Never not reblog

Tumblr got anxiety advice. Fuck yeah.

Read this earlier, and it helped me a lot tonight.

always re-posting this.

Shared Sep 15 with 554,038 notes » via - source + reblog




itsstuckyinmyhead:

Band Geek Humor 

Shared Sep 15 with 59,191 notes » via - source + reblog